Script Writing - Second Draft Analysis

Second Draft Analysis


For my second draft of my script the things that I have been working on is making a monologue for the character Danielle. The monologue is about her finding out that she is pregnant a few days before she has an audition for a drama school. Danielle was drunk at a party and got herself in a situation and the end result is finding out that she is pregnant. The monologue is going through the emotions that she is in disbelief that she is pregnant. I wanted this monologue to be really believable that Danielle is in utter shock and doesn't know what to do. I feel that working on this for the second draft that this has worked. The structure is looking good I currently have 15 pages ( Word Document) and I have 6 Scenes which I feel is a good amount as there are lots of sections to a scene as there are 3 main story lines for the characters in the play. I feel as a second draft before the woman from the National Theatre looks at the script this is a decent length script but I am really interested to see what else she says could be added or changed to improve my script further. Characters I feel are coming together more and are having depth to them and aren't too bland. Things that need development is to continue to look at the grammar of the script, however I will proof read it at a higher level when it comes to a final script as the drafts have room for improvement. I feel that the character Megan needs to have more meat to her character, so I will see what the lady from the National theatre says about it before I make any more drastic changes to the characters. In my final piece I would like to have a fully understood and structured play which from an audience point of view makes perfect sense. I would also like my characters to have a deep rooted understanding to what their story is from an audience point of view and also whoever would play the characters so they become the character and not just read the script. Further consideration are peoples ages in the play and also more development of staging how the final scene will end and how it will be stages with the three stories going on at once at the same location (Train station) but on different parts of the station. I have also looked at how I want that scene to be staged. I have thought about the different locations for each scene. I feel that I would like to have some knowledge of how to make my script longer from the National Theatre woman, I am looking forward to hearing what feedback she has for my play.

Link to second draft of script